


Child is slowly taken

by jperalta



Category: Chilling Adventures of Sabrina (TV 2018)
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Bullying, Canon Trans Character, Child Abuse, Child Neglect, Dissociation, Emotionally Repressed, Enemies to Friends, Flashbacks, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Mild Blood, Panic Attacks, Past Rape/Non-con, Past Sexual Assault, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Public Humiliation, Self-Harm, Sexual Assault, Trapped, Victim Blaming, Vomiting, Wrists
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:27:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26584384
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jperalta/pseuds/jperalta
Summary: Set to take place immediately after the scene where Hilda just totally calls out Billy (and Carl) and Billy looks like he's about so sh*t his pants from horror. So then Theo happens to see Billy having a panic attack outside and begrudgingly decides to check on him.
Relationships: Billy Marlin & Theo Putnam
Comments: 5
Kudos: 12





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place before Theo comes out as trans but I’ll be referring to him as Theo and using he/him pronouns. I ship this as a friendship so HARD and I wish they'd delve deeper into Billy's backstory because he has such a potential for growth. Let me know if there's more tags I should add xx Title: The Cranberries - Zombie

Billy and Carl were still in the bookstore, still frozen to the spots they’d been in when Hilda somehow revealed the two boys’ deepest secrets. Carl was blushing - intensely - worried that Billy would absolutely  _ hate _ him now, would push him away and never speak to him again. But Billy had hardly even heard that part, because after this woman, this  _ random _ woman who seemed to know so much about his past - after she had spewed out everything, Billy was left with a chest that felt like it was caving in on itself. 

Carl was calling out to him but Billy could hardly process any of it. His hands were shaking, his breathing was becoming short and shattered, and all he could think of was the past. Somehow the two of them ended up outside in an alleyway, but Carl was so embarrassed about everything that he ran away before Billy could say anything that might hurt him. So that left Billy, alone, leaning against the wall of a building, hand clutching his chest as he desperately tried to get his breath back but couldn’t. It was all getting away from him. It was all too much. Billy was quivering, hyperventilating, and started weeping as he slid down the wall. The brick was hard and he felt it scratching his back as he kept going down until he landed on the cold concrete. Maybe it broke his skin, maybe it was for the best. 

He couldn’t believe this was happening again. It had been years since his last one until that night in the cave that sparked it all up again. He could feel hands that weren’t his on his skin, he could hear laughing and whispers, and he  _ hurt _ all over. He remembered his face being pushed into a pillow so hard that he swore he was going to suffocate and die right where he was. At the time he had prayed for that to happen, and times afterwards too. He’d prayed for anything to happen to make the memories go away, but they never would.

Theo had just run out of the store too, and looked into the alley where they saw Billy, legs sprawled out on the ground, hand grasping at his heart, crying. Theo knew he could just walk away. He owed Billy nothing. Yet this Billy was so different, so vulnerable, practically lying on the ground like that, obviously struggling. And from what Hilda had said, Theo was hardly surprised. They weren’t sure of the specifics but clearly it was something awful, because Billy had looked so terrified, like he wished he could just disappear away from the world. So Theo battled with himself for a moment before letting out a groan and heading towards Billy.

When Billy saw a shadow coming towards him, he immediately flinched away. He wasn’t sure who it was, even though there was a part of his mind that immediately thought it was those boys from camp from years ago. And Billy couldn’t help but to feel like he was eleven years old again. He curled his arms around his legs, pressed his chin against his knees and squeezed his eyes shut, whispering to himself,  _ please go away. This isn’t happening. Please make it stop. I don’t want to do this anymore. _

Theo crouched down in front of Billy and saw how totally out of it he was. Theo reached out a hand, touched Billy on the shoulder, but all Billy could feel was the sensation of burning on his skin mixed with complete terror, so he flinched away, tried to push himself against the wall more but he was stuck. 

“Billy, hey,” Theo said in a soothing tone, trying to coax Billy back from whatever it was. 

But Billy was still hyperventilating, trying hopelessly to get more oxygen into his body but again, it wasn’t working. Theo just watched as Billy continued to rock back and forth, whispering to themselves. Against his better judgment, Theo went to try to touch Billy again, but Billy pulled away more aggressively than before, hitting his head against the wall. Through a sob he yelled, “ _ stop!  _ Please, stop touching me,” before wrapping his arms around his own body and then again whispering, “please, don’t touch me.”

Theo jumped away, regretting trying to touch Billy in the first place, so instead they tried talking again. “Billy, it’s me.” Theo looked around, trying to think of anything that could help. “Your name is Billy Marlin. You’re sitting outside the bookstore, and I won’t touch you again. You think you’re somewhere else. Maybe you think I’m someone else, but it’s not true. You’re Billy Marlin, sitting outside the bookstore. You go to Baxter High.” Theo kept repeating these facts to Billy until Billy finally looked up and looked into Theo’s eyes. “You’re Billy Marlin,” Theo said again, “and you’re going to be okay.”

The tears kept falling from Billy’s eyelids as the two stared at each other until the intimacy was too intense and Billy broke the gaze by turning his head. And then things felt incredibly awkward. Theo plopped his whole body onto the ground in front of Billy, and Billy ran a still-shaking hand through his hair, briefly touching the beads of sweat that had formed on his forehead before letting out a turbulent sigh.

“Are… are you okay?” Theo stuttered out.

And Billy didn’t respond right away, he just took in another deep breath and continued to stare down the alley. The wind was picking up and pieces of trash were starting to blow around, but the breeze felt nice on his skin. Finally Billy looked back at Theo, but at this point Theo was looking at the ground. Billy felt confused, and still scared. How could this all have happened this way? Billy swallowed then finally said with a hoarse voice, “do you really care?”

The sadness in Billy’s voice didn’t go unnoticed by Theo, yet he still couldn’t just put everything behind them and suddenly become best friends. “You know, despite everything, I think I do,” Theo replied. There was another dark silence between them and Billy still felt like he just wanted to disappear off the face of the earth. “Was that true? Everything she said back there?” Theo asked, still in a gentle tone. 

Billy thought for a moment, unsure whether or not to reply, to confirm or to scoff and push Theo away so Billy could run back to his cold and uncaring home and bury himself in his bed. Nobody ever believed him - not even his own parents - so why would Theo? This kid from school who Billy bullied incessantly, and for what? Because they remind Billy of what happened when he was eleven? It’s not Theo’s fault, he knows that, but he’s way too fucking scared of ever having an actual conversation about anything personal. So instead of running away, instead of saying some shitty snappy comeback, Billy just blinks back tears, looks back to the ground and nods.

The confirmation strikes Theo’s heart hard, and he can’t help but to feel an overwhelming sense of pity for Billy. Sure, Hilda, hadn’t said exactly what had happened, but it was enough for Theo to put a guess together. And with what they knew now, and the look of shame and sadness and humiliation on Billy’s face, Theo couldn’t help but to feel differently. The truth didn’t excuse anything, but it definitely explained a lot. Theo swallowed his own pride and could only mumble out, “I’m sorry that happened to you.” They caught each other’s glance again and it all made Billy feel so terribly vulnerable that he just wanted to get sick right there in the alley. He hit his head against the brick again, hard as if to punish himself for something, and Theo leaned forwards before remembering that touching was very bad, at least right now. Instead they leaned back to their previous position and said, “don’t hurt yourself. You don’t have to do that.”

Billy felt overwhelmed with a thousand emotions he couldn’t explain. “Why are you being nice to me right now?”

Theo shrugged. “I couldn’t just let you… let you freak out alone.”

“Why? So you can tell everybody about what you saw? What you heard?” Billy choked out, then almost immediately regretted it because of the way Theo shrank into himself. 

“No, I-I would never do that.” There was another lull. “Billy, you don’t have to be as bad as they were to you. You can be so much better.”

Billy’s face scrunched up tight, as he felt like he was about to start sobbing all over again. Instead he took in another deep breath, forced every emotion he ever had down as far as it could go. Then, as if twitching away from everything, he stood up and ran home as fast as he could, leaving Theo still sitting on the pavement, wondering what the hell just happened.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW: sexual assault

Billy wasn't doing super great. He hadn't been for a while now. Something had sparked within in that made it nearly impossible to sleep, to eat, even to speak to anyone, but especially his parents. They must have noticed that he was struggling - they just didn't want to say anything about it. They didn't want to risk Billy bringing up _that thing_ again. Sometimes he could swear it felt like his mother was avoiding his eyes, and it made him feel so hopeless

There were times at school when the crowds and the people were just too much, and he felt like he couldn't breathe. So sometimes he'd duck into a bathroom, desperately trying to get his breathing under control. Sometimes he couldn't, so he'd just lock himself in the stall of one of the more unused bathrooms, sit himself on the floor and cry and cry until it all passed, or until he felt like he couldn't cry anymore. He'd show up to class and yell at anyone who even looked his way, especially if they looked into his eyes. He wasn't sure what he was so afraid of, but he knew he didn't want anyone to see him like this.

He was walking through a crowded hallway when he saw an older kid, Wayne, coming towards him - the friend of a brother of Carl's, or something. He wasn't entirely sure, but he knew the way this guy was looking at him made Billy want to squirm out of his skin. His palms started to sweat as he ducked into an empty hallway, which in retrospect was a horrible idea because when Wayne followed him there, the two of them were alone and Billy started to feel his chest caving in on itself.

"What do you-" But before Billy could get out the question, his head was slammed against the wall and Wayne was pinning his body against it. Billy was stuck - again - and fuck, it really felt like the end of the world. Everything started blurring around him and all he could think of was how much he wanted to be alone, how desperately he _needed_ Wayne to take his fingers off Billy's skin, and how Billy was entirely helpless. He could feel his stomach churning and he felt like he was going to just pass out.

"Heard you were up to some weird shit in a cave the other day?" Billy's eyes widened as he remembered everyone swearing this would never get out. But of course it got out - stuff always does. Wayne just smiled and squeezed Billy's arm harder, and Billy was all but bursting into tears. "What did you guys do, exactly? Some weird kinky shit, I bet." Wayne started running his thumb over Billy's skin in a pseudo-gentle way that just added confusion on top of all the fear and hopelessness Billy already felt. "What about this, hm?" Wayne threw a hand over the pants towards Billy's dick and squeezed just a bit.

The suddenness of the assault made it so Billy immediately started hyperventilating, whimpering, pleading "please, stop it, please." But Wayne didn't. He just gripped Billy harder so Billy let out another small sob as Wayne added to all the horrible things Billy already relived almost constantly in his head, all the times that Billy had been reminded that his skin, his body, wasn't his own. "Oh, do you not like that?" Wayne asked sarcastically. "Is this not how it all went down?" Billy was squirming more, trying to push Wayne off of him but the guy must have been twice what Billy weighed, so every attempt he made to push away just went unnoticed. "Here, why don't you show me..." Wayne grabbed at Billy's wrist and started to move it towards his own dick.

"What the fuck?" came a voice from down the hall. Though Billy was still almost entirely out of it, he recognized Theo's voice immediately. Later he'd wonder if that meant anything.

"What," Wayne chuckled, "you want in?" The hope continued to drain from Billy as he stood there, still stuck under Wayne's arms.

Theo charged towards the pair, and incredibly, Wayne backed away and threw up his hands. Theo was small, but somehow still intimidating as hell just because of the sheer rage he let takeover his face, his eyes, his whole body. When Wayne's hands were off Billy's body, Billy almost fainted.

"There's fucking cameras all over this school, you moron. All I have to do is mention this hallway and this time and they can look it up and fucking arrest you, so back the fuck up." Wayne said nothing more, just nodded and walked around the corner.

Billy felt his body continue to tremble as he tried and failed to process what had just happened. The air around him was too thin and his entire body felt like it was burning. Even though Wayne was gone, Billy could still feel his hands on him, could still feel the hands of everyone who'd ever touched him without him first saying it was okay.

"Billy," Theo said softly, "there's an empty classroom right there. Why don't we go in?" Billy was still only partly conscious. He could hear Theo's voice but couldn't entirely comprehend what he was saying. When Theo lifted his arms to gesture to the room, Billy flinched. "I'm not going to touch you," Theo said softly. Billy's eyes followed the tips of Theo's fingers as he went into the nearby empty classroom.

Once the two of them were in there, Billy just started weeping. He felt stupid, but he couldn't control it. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. God, I can't... I don't know what to do. What... what even just... everything is so confusing. Everything is so damn _hard._ I'm so stupid, so fucking stupid. Why does this keep... what is wrong with me? I—"

"Billy, hey," Theo said loudly, interrupting Billy's frantic mumbling. Billy felt a sting on his palm and looked down to see he had been squeezing his fist so tightly that his fingernail had punctured the skin and he'd made himself bleed. Theo grabbed a napkin from nearby and handed it over. "Sit down, come on." He gestured to a desk and Billy sat down, pressing the napkin against the small cut on his palm. "You need to breathe, man, okay?" So Billy did what he was told. "As for the cameras, we—"

"No!" Billy cut Theo off. The cut on his palm continued to sting.

"You can press charges. What he did was assault. It—"

"No, please don't say anything," Billy pleaded. "I... my parents can't find out."

Just the thought of them knowing made him shiver and wince. He thought back to the first time, when he'd come home from camp at age eleven. They had asked what was wrong, why Billy was being so quiet, and he didn't know any better, so he told the truth. He remembered asking if that was an okay and normal thing for friends to do to each other, even though he knew those boys weren't his friends, and his parents knew too. His father had said he was lying, and it was the first time Billy had ever felt a barrier between the two of them. Billy had argued with them both, gone into detail, said everything that had happened over and over again until he made himself vomit due to reliving it. He needed them to believe him, and they didn't. Eventually his father would walk out of the room whenever Billy mentioned it, once getting a slap to the face. And that was the day his mother had dragged him by his hair into the bathroom and shoved a bar of soap so far into his mouth that he gagged and choked and cried and promised he'd never bring it up again. So he didn't and they didn't either and they all continued on living under one roof, unable to talk about anything real anymore. Sometimes it was so quiet in that house Billy thought he was going to lose his mind. Sometimes he'd lie on his bed and stare at the white ceiling until he could feel his heart beating and he'd lose control over his breathing again. He needed help. He knew that. But he also knew that bringing up anything would just result in more abuse that he just didn't have the energy for anymore.

"Don't say anything, please," Billy repeated.

"I won't," Theo agreed. "I won't, I promise."


End file.
